Sunday, December 10, 2006


I spent last night at the roller derby. Seriously. Not just me, though, but Midtown Memphis seemed to move en masse to the Funquest in Collierville to witness The Legion of Zoom take on the PrissKilla Prezleys in a Memphis Roller Derby pre-season match. It was loud, fast and more fun than I expected. I still don’t understand the rules or how the point system works, but there were a lot of points, final score was something like PP 12,349 and LoZ 11,958. Anyway, the Z Girls lost, which is too bad because my sister is on that team. So is Stacey, who also took away a broken fibula and tibula, which shows you how rough these ladies can be. I was surprised that it was Stacey who broke a bone because I really expected the break to belong to Elizabeth. When we were kids, none of us was really athletic, but certainly not her, and when she skated out onto the floor for the first time last night, the look on her face took me back to our childhood when she was trying to ride her bike for the first time or playing any sport or just, you know, running. And then she got out on the rink for the introductions and her team had this little choreographed number where they all rip off their oversized blouses to reveal their more revealing roller derby uniforms. I didn’t care for that part at all.

Also last night, through the forces of good beyond our control, we found ourselves with only one child for the weekend. The three older ones were in Nashville, which is just a hair west of the Funquest in Collierville, with their grandparents. After the big show we, along with pregnant Andria, took GK to a bar because we know what good parenting is all about. It was fun to watch all the pretty people at Bosco’s look on in horror as we walked in with a 6-month-old to interrupt their bad dates and cell phone calls. But she was good. She had just been to a roller derby bout and that made her just a little more hip than the rest of them, despite what they thought about themselves.

It was a very interesting, very raucous time. Not too raucous, though, it being Collierville and with every other person at the bout wearing a black T-shirt stating they were SECURITY, as though there was some trouble to be expected at the Family Funquest this night. But the spectators there were good, enthusiastic Midtown people. People like us, Click, Mr. and Mrs. artbutcher, S.A.M. and The Admiral featuring Miss M, The Saucier, Harry from Elliot’s, Mel, Heather, Julie, Warren and the rest of Team O-G, and the Chockleyblogs (technically from East Memphis, but not that far east!). Everyone was there to cheer on Moxie Dynamite, Smashimi, Angelina Rolie and all the other funny names. We look forward to the next match but hope that the Memphis Roller Derby is able to find a venue closer to home so we can keep the scales from tipping too far east.

[editor’s note: I just spoke to Stacey who spent the night in the hospital and is due to have surgery any time now to put a metal plate in her leg. She’s the Bionic Blogger now. Good luck, Stacey!]

[Photo of Elizabeth by Click(Daily). Photo of GK by Sassy Molassy]